Last night I had a bit of an emotional turn.
I sat watching Homeland and suddenly panicked.
You see, Homeland is kind of plodding along at the moment. No Brody - yet - and too much Dana.
Dana, oh Dana, you hormonal, mixed up little thing you. 16 years old and rolling around in the laundry room having rumpy pumpy with your equally mixed up beau. 16. SIXTEEN!?!
My little girl is nearly half way to that age. In just over eight years time, or maybe earlier, I'm going to lose her to hormones, emotions, boys - or possibly girls, I'm cool with that. But she'll be 'gone'. She won't need me anymore - well she'll probably need my money and stuff.
More to the point she won't WANT me anymore will she? She'll be all moody and I'll be too embarrassing or something.
Basically I'm panicking.
I'm looking back too much and thinking we should have done more each day, each weekend, each holiday.
Yesterday we had a house day due to the rain and a stinking cold on my part. We didn't do much. We should have done more. I should be making more of my time with them.
Time goes too quick.
I'm rambling. I apologise.
I'm tired, and to be honest maybe a bit hormonal myself today, so am probably blowing this up way out of proportion but I have moments where I just freak out.
How do we stop the panic?
How do we savour the moments?
How do we keep them young?
How can I bottle them and not let them go?
x x x
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Oh gosh, I cant answer this as I feel exactly the same as you.
ReplyDeleteI suppose we savour the moment of now by making wonderful memories. We can't keep them young but make sure we guide them to make informed choices and make sure they keep talking to us. We have to let them grow and become fully formed people in their own right.
It is hard being a parent isnt it.
Yes, it is. And I'm positive time goes quicker the moment you become one.
Deletei so hear you too. with my eldest now in high school...it's just all too much at times! and the other evening we had to have the 'father christmas' conversation...i cried buckets afterwards! time is going wayyyy too fast for my liking! please please let me know if you get the answer to bottling them up! xx
ReplyDeleteNot the Father Christmas conversation?! Dreading that one.
DeleteYou grow with your kids and change. It is different and right now for me it bloody hard work but it is the deal with parents you let them grow and change but don't ever believe they won't need you because they do and more than for your money (though they do need even more of that!).
ReplyDeleteOf course you are too cool to be embarrassing am I right, though apparently it is not cool to say 'cool' so I have blown it there!
Enjoy your time with your guys now and look forward to enjoying it in different ways as they got older. x x x x
Thanks Ali, wise words as always!
DeleteI don't know, but when you find out, let me know.
ReplyDeleteDEEP BREATHS - ok that done, I understand, althought I have boys and dont have to worry about many of the things that girls come with. I get the panic over the kids not needing you. Just remember when it comes that time that everything you do embarrasses them, amp it up and make it even more Embarrassing. Remember to enjoy each day, even if all you do is sit at home watching television and playing games.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'm sure I can do embarrassing very well! I will enjoy each day x
DeleteAggghhh, panicking now. 10 years until boys!!!
ReplyDeleteI love how interesting they are now at 9, 7 and 4 and look forward to seeing how they'll turn out. At the same time I'm hoping it won't happen too fast. I realise though, that even my giant 9 year old who seems so grown up, is only little compared to how he's going to be one day. I suppose we just can't envisage that our love for them might grow even stronger as they grow bigger so perhaps the future is some we should embrace and not be afraid of?
ReplyDeleteMy eldest is eleven and I'e instilled a sense of panic about his life ahead of him.He's becoming more independent and has plans for the future already.But yes savour all those moments, be part of their lives, make time for them when you're at your busiest.
ReplyDeleteI've been feeling like this a lot lately, as I am back to work in a few weeks after maternity leave. As I had a difficult start I now wish I would have appreciated that time more. But hey, things change and I have to accept that. I look back at my childhood and I think of fun times, I just hope that every day I can do something to make her smile x
ReplyDeletesometimes I have these moments and they freak me out too! funny enough I'm not really nostalgic for Wilf to be a baby again as I love this age but it's a bit terrifying how fast the past two years have gone! also I really need to get into Homeland x
ReplyDeleteIt is scary how the days, weeks, months, years just fly. I've had a few 'broody' moments but actually just want to go back and enjoy them as babies all over again. And Homeland? Start from the beginning - series 1 the better of the lot so far ;)
ReplyDeleteI over stressed with my first and would love to go back and undo that! Good luck returning to work x
ReplyDeleteThe seven yr old has decided she will have a partner but they won't get married. Also designs have been made on babies - she's not having them as she doesn't want her tummy cut open. Why s she concerning herself with all that already?!!
ReplyDeleteE has already paired every one off in her Y3 class. She's 7!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete