I had the intention of covering a full time teaching post from Easter, a decision we didn't make lightly and could only commit to with the help of my in laws who were going to move locally from France to help out. Well, basically be our wraparound childcare so I could get to work before the children turned up - that's kind of important.
Unfortunately a not very pleasant illness has been diagnosed so the in laws, quite rightly, are staying put in France where they are already swiftly being dealt with by their local health service. We now sit and wait.
Meanwhile, the reality set in.
BOOM! Slight panic attack and tears.
"How the hell am I going to get to work and teach 5 days a week and get the children to breakfast club and pay the crappily high fees for after school club where they don't even get a hot meal and then get home to get them a meal and plan my work, and I always said I would never put the kiddies in round the clock childcare to go to work, and, and, and...."
Discussion with hubs ensued and the conclusion was met; I couldn't do it. Ok, fine, I couldn't do it.